Finally, 2016 brings forth some good news. A new study from Syracuse University (that actually did reputable things like use a like use a large diverse group of subjects), shows that eating chocolate in the morning can have some seriously positive effects.
Chocolate for breakfast gives the human body a boost in the morning, when we need energy to get going. We burn more in the morning to get going than throughout the rest of the day, so dessert in the morning gives an intellectual bump and staves off those sugary cravings later in the day, when you’re more likely to straight up binge. This is apparently due to a nutrient found in chocolate flavonoid.
Yada yada yada, blah blah blah, smart people said chocolate keeps you trim and boosts brain power. The only bummer is that should be consumed before 9am. But for those of you who don’t roll out of bed and jog to the subway to get to work in the morning, maybe that’s a feasible thing.
Honestly, let’s all agree we’re not going to look too deep into the ~science~ aspect of this study, because I don’t really care, I just want an excuse to eat chocolate. Not that I need one. Here’s a sneak peek of my upcoming breakfast dietary plan: