Can You Dildo It? Tumblr Discusses The Potential Dangers Of Boning This Phallic Mineral | YUYU
Stuff

Can You Dildo It? Tumblr Discusses The Potential Dangers Of Boning This Phallic Mineral

Katie Cannon February 10, 2017 May 1st, 2017

Welcome to Tumblr, a place where dick jokes aren’t just tossed around, but thoroughly researched and examined from all possible angles. In this week’s segment of “Can You Dildo It?” a group of curious minds collected info from a vast network of Internet friends in order to ascertain whether or not this very suggestive hunk of shiny green malachite could be safely stuck in human orifices. For science!

It all began with a reply to a photo post of the long, girthy mineral–a lingering question, with a simple, abrupt answer: yes, this malachite may look an awful lot like a humongous fancy dildo, but you should definitely not to try to fuck it.

But as it turns out, the answer was not nearly not that simple. Others claimed that since the substance was often used in jewelry, it should be perfectly safe for the human body. Still others countered that malachite would severely fuck up your vaginal flora.

It was a debate for the ages.

Could you fuck it if you wore a condom? Could you put it in your butt? People Googled their brains out, they tagged their qualified friends, they consulted journalists, they used the scientific method. Then it was all connected to the Flint, Michigan water crisis! It was all quite controversial and mind-boggling, but they eventually came to a conclusion about whether you can, in fact, make sweet sweet love to this malachite stalactite.

Check it out:

View post on imgur.com

Basically, it could potentially dissolve in your vagina or get stuck in your butt. So maybe don’t fuck this stalactite.

 

Via Imgur

Related stuff Categories